bookmark_border05/23/26 – Astrology, Personal Shit & Memes

Text 1: When you’ve been working on your mind and spirit for so long and now the Universe tells you it’s time to work on your physical body

Text 2: Don’t make me run! I’m full of chocolate!

I’ve had this image saved on my phone FOREVER; it’s an alien skull carved in dark Smoky Quartz. The eyes are Labradorite. So cool and mesmerizing, I feel like it’s one of my guides…

It’s really weird when astrologers keep on saying that Sagittarius likes to travel. I don’t like to travel physically but emotionally, mentally & spiritually? Yes.

Text 1: Me looking at the current astrology to confirm my mood swings.

Text 2: Omg I knew it

Text 3: Look at this mess

I am still downloading & organizing my photos from iCloud to Flickr and found old pics of Miri my second cat.

I woke up this morning feeling extremely tired and stressed out about the current state of the world, particularly in the lovely USA. So much that I had to let it out, meaning I had to cry in front of my husband. He knows I NEVER cry as it’s usually the other way around (he’s a double water sign). I literally couldn’t stop the tears flowing – I am SO tired of paying bills when everything is getting more expensive while the orange man gets away with so fucking much. I just got a pay increase recently but now it’s going to the utilities bill and gas for the cars.

I don’t want to repeat all the negative shit going on in politics & economics so I’ll just leave it at that. This is supposed to be my therapy right now.

So yeah, I cried. But not to worry, I am okay. I actually needed that, and I feel better now actually.

If you ever have really strong feelings or emotions that you’ve been bottling up and have been holding inside – it’s better to just let it out whether it’s through writing or crying which is what I did. Just don’t take it out on someone else.

I probably mentioned that I have a lot of Saturn in my long term influences lately; I really think that’s why I’m feeling this way – Saturn opposition natal Moon and Saturn trine natal Sun. Aargh.

I know at the end of the day, I am still blessed. I wake up with a roof over my head, I still have a job and I’m not sick or injured. But I had to get it out at that very moment, as Saturn was pressing on me.

Here is an old card pull from 2019 – IX of Pentacles – self-mastery, attainment, gains. Desire for financial security. Money. Success. Material comfort. Leisure time. Fruitfulness. Cultivation. Self-worth. Well-being. Pleasure. Refinement. Prosperity as a result of past efforts. Solitary affluence. Well-deserved success. (Source: Tarot Plain and Simple by Anthony Louis)

Here is the 9 of Pentacles from the Albano Waite version, along with some other cards pulled from the same deck as well as cards pulled from Sacred Symbols Oracle deck. Surrounded by a Quartz crystal grid with a Selenite on top. I tend to pull the same cards over and over, even though this was from 2019. Even ChatGPT, Grok and Gemini would pull the same cards for me when I had questions. When learning tarot, pay attention to the same cards coming up over and over again – that means something that you should probably pay attention to.

Tuesday May 26, 2026 – we have absolutely nothing to complain about, as we live in the United States. There are unspeakable horrors, corruption and genocide that is happening in other countries.

bookmark_border5/6/2022 + 5/6/2026 Synchronicity

This is an old photo of cards I pulled for Friday, May 6th…it may have been from 2022. Yet while searching for something else today (Wednesday May 6th 2026), this photo somehow came up. Time is wild, I can’t stress this enough. I’ll be back to add the message I’m getting from these cards 4 years later.

You have the power to become anything you want. Set your expectations for yourself, and know that you will become whatever you think about.

How do I read cards for myself? I will start with the tarot pulls since those are harder to interpret:

I read from one of my many tarot books that instead of looking at the cards, step inside the scene itself. What is going on inside each card?

Card 1: X of Wands – the doggie is carrying too many wands = you’re doing too much and overwhelming yourself.

Card 2: IV of Cups – are you meditating or procrastinating? Maybe you’re avoiding something or someone.

Card 3: VIII of Wands – no people just wands moving fast in the air. Perhaps you’ll need to act or create something fast or a creative opportunity is coming your way (sometimes they say within 8 days).

Card 4: V of Cups – the figure is upset because there are 3 cups that spilled, even though there are 2 still left standing. Disappointment, grief, not seeing the positive side.

For the oracle cards, they’re easier to read because there’s words on them:

Card 1: Power – you have power available to you at all times. What kind of power would you like; is it self serving or does it help others?

Card 2: Talisman – stones, crystals, keys, rings, necklaces or any object that has magical powers can be useful in enhancing the energy of your magical requests and manifestations.

Card 3: Focus – focus on what you want. But make sure it’s in service to your highest and best good.

By the way, when I ask questions during readings for myself – believe it or not, I am not there to judge (this takes A LOT of practice btw). The tarot and oracle cards help us to “see” and “hear” different aspects of ourselves. A lot of the times it can be contradictory but if you learn that everything in life is contradictory, you’ll eventually learn to make sense out of the cards.

bookmark_borderThe Devil XV – HK Tarot & Occult Tarot

Tuesday 2/10/2026 // Edit: I wanted to add a photo of HK Baphomet and Baphomet from the Occult Tarot deck. Side by side, they look aesthetically pleasing to me.


Feb 3, 2026: I love this particular card – it represents my style – kawaii occult graphics. Also, purple and orange just go together really well. Again this unique HK tarot deck was a limited edition purchase from Etsy years ago so don’t ask where I got it from. But hey, there might be something similar?

I’m sure people who read my blog – including family members – will assume I’m a devil worshipper or satanist just because I’m into occult shit. What most people don’t really know is that the devil isn’t an actual creature – it’s a composite symbol. It represents the material plane – worldy success, addiction, obsession, people, situations or things that ‘bind’ us to them in a negative way (bondage). It’s really just an invisible force that gets projected onto people and things; for example – women, booze, drugs, sex, white people, etc.

Like when people are trying to tempt us, or even something playful as an invite to something fun, daring, or out of the norm – we usually say ‘you’re being the devil right now’.

The Devil is also associated with Capricorn and the number 15.

bookmark_borderA Celtic Cross Reading for Myself – 12/6/2017

I am and have been living in the eternal now moment more these days. Life has been feeling more and more timeless the more I let go of certain concepts, like birthdays.

Like today is supposed to be my “40th” birthday but what does that really mean? It’s a construct, created by humans to measure time.

Anyways, before I ramble on about esoteric things – the whole purpose of this blog post was to post my first Celtic Cross reading I did for myself today. For the longest time, I feel as if I have been intimidated by this spread and was actually looking for someone to read my cards for me; but through the process of searching for someone I realized that I ‘could’ just read for myself (even though I still need help from a book). To anyone who is reading this, I’m not a professional tarot reader at all – I just read for myself.

So here is a photo of my reading using my favorite deck the HK Tarot with the card and card position meanings:

Position 1  / Heart of the Matter: IV of Pentacles

Position 2 / Opposing Factor: I The Magician

Position 3 / Root Cause or Unconscious Influence: XV The Devil

Position 4 / The Past: Page of Cups

Position 5 / Attitudes and Beliefs or Conscious Influence: IV The Emperor

Position 6 / Future or Approaching Influence: Ace of Wands

Position 7 / You as Your Present Self: II of Pentacles

Position 8 / You as Others See You: IX The Hermit

Position 9 / Guidance: III of Pentacles

Position 10 / Outcome: X of Pentacles

I’ve definitely been focused on business stuff lately so of course it makes total sense that a lot of pentacles are present in my reading. I’ve had money on my mind a lot – how to make it, how to keep it, how to make more of it in a way that’s enjoyable to me. The devil is ever present, reminding me of my strong attachments to material wealth (money).

I used Joan Bunning’s Learning The Tarot book as my guide; it was one of the first tarot books I got for myself and seems to be the book I still go back to often.

Do you have a tarot book that you really like? I’d love to know what books you read.

bookmark_borderDeath Tarot & Sacred Symbols Oracle Card

The Death card appeared to me twice this week – first it was Death from the Sacred Symbols Oracle deck with the skull and rose at the beginning of this week on Monday, (top left)…

and then last night when I came home from work. I was sitting at my desk talking to a friend on the phone when I randomly pulled the Death card again from my HK tarot deck (bottom right).

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Edit 10/2/19: some people have asked me where I got the HK tarot deck. I got it from Etsy but I don’t think the person is making them anymore. Sorry! I’m guessing it was a bootleg and the person didn’t want to get sued by HK / Sanrio for using their images.

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I had a few other decks on the table so I decided to pull the other Death cards from them for this photo: top right is from the Albano-Waite deck and bottom left is from Camoin / Jodorowsky’s Tarot de Marseille.

The reason why I have all these tarot and oracle decks is because I am learning from them, they guide me throughout the days of the week. I feel better prepared for real life situations (whether I am consciously aware of them or not), and I admire the artwork too. The Tarot is a teacher. I’ve barely been studying the Tarot for only about 4 years now and I guess this is my method of learning; I learned that the same cards tend to come up in different decks. It probably doesn’t make sense to others, but for me it helps me to see comparisons. Consider it a double or triple confirmation. Some decks I use more frequently than others and so they end up sitting on my desk for months.

Reflecting on all the violent events so far this year made me realize even more that Death is and will always be a constant part of our lives. Someone is probably dying right now at this very moment, but we’re not aware because it’s just another day. So we only pay attention to what we see on TV and social media. We cannot dictate to Death who lives and who dies; Death doesn’t care if you’re gay, a person of color, a cop, a rich or poor person or someone of authority…

Death comes for everyone, this is the ultimate truth. Once you strip away all the complex feelings that humans attach to death – grief, sadness, hate, anger and everything in between…

there is just that, the natural part of life. It seems unnatural that a person dies at the hand of another, but at the same time this is and has been the history of human civilization. A person dies, and another one is born. It’s the cycle that keeps on going, no matter how we feel about it. The World Tarot card appeared to me this week too.

Death is certainly the most painful of all teachers. It is the one that is hard to let go of, to get over with and move on from. It’s especially painful for us who are still alive because we’re the ones who have to keep on living and remembering.

My mom passed away 10 years ago from cancer. I feel as if it was only in these last 4 years when the Tarot showed itself to me, that I started to feel like I could live again.

This is not to say that your feelings and emotions are invalid. They are valid and you have a right to feel the way you do. You can grieve and experience all the feels for as long as you need to, this is what it’s like to be human. Just know that this too shall pass, and that you have people that understand what you’re going through.

Where there is death, there is also rebirth, growth, transformation, healing, a new way of seeing things, a different perspective and so much more. The effects of death are far-reaching; peace, love, unity, justice, karma, and other cause and effects can spring from it. It really puts me in awe.