Lol I’m super proud of this video that I edited on the desktop version of CapCut – James doesn’t like to show his face which actually presented a fun challenge for me to put an emoji on his face while motion tracking it. Mind you, I’ve never really played with CapCut (only on my phone for Tiktok) but it was such a pain to edit on my phone so luckily CapCut offers a desktop version of their mobile app.
Anyways, if you’d like to follow my 2 British Shorthair cats’ Instagram it’s @mika_miriya_bsh
This video was filmed 13 years ago – the year was 2011, when I was still painting graffiti. I was pretty chunky too, haha. I like how my piece came out btw. Oh and the comments are funny too now that I look back at it; I actually avoided reading them for a long time because feelings or even watching this video because of my weight. Of course most guys always have something gross to say.
Time is so wild.
Painted with WINK and Angel179 for Art Primo.
My previous boss (RIP) would often say this. And I think about it whenever my thoughts spiral out of control.
The irony is that my old boss would start to complicate things, then we’re made to follow his madness. Everyone contradicts themselves.
The font is Laser, an 80’s style font.
Some apps along with my personal calendars say the moon is in Sagittarius, others in Capricorn. Shrug if I know BUT I always tend to feel more energized & motivated when the moon is in Sagittarius since it’s my Sun; determined and ‘into my work’ when the moon is in Capricorn (my Mercury).
I don’t have anything to say, as you can see I’ve gone ghost on nearly all my IG accounts or simply deactivated them. It takes so much energy and effort to be on there; I don’t know when I’ll feel motivated to pick up my side projects again.
Introverts gonna introvert I guess…
I just wanted to post this meme as it was buried in my Instagram saves. Credit: @thatcatbobbie
I hope you’re doing well. I’m just here lurking and being on the internets and pondering the next stage of adulthood: do I want a house, or do I want to retire with lots of money? I constantly go between wanting everything and wanting nothing. It’s hard to decide when you’re a Libra moon!
My life is pretty boring these days. I’m still trying to think of how to work less while making the same amount of money or even more and I still want to take a year off work. But I’m super thankful to have this creature in my life. Her name is Mika and she’s a black tortie British Shorthair. You can follow her on IG @mikatortiecat. I couldn’t decide which pic I liked better so I made both into a gif.
What’s life like for me right now? Well I still can’t afford to buy a home in Los Angeles but at least I live where I want to live and it’s close to work so that’s a tradeoff I suppose. If you want to be in LA, you simply can’t have it all unless you’re rich AF.
I can hear my mom saying that I should’ve bought a home in 2003. Knowing myself at that time I was still hella irresponsible though and just wanted to paint and do whatever the fuck I wanted to do. I mean, why do parents project their dreams unto their children? She made me feel like THAT was supposed to be my ultimate goal in life.
Also it takes me a long fucking time to grasp real estate terms and concepts. I’m in my mid-40’s and I’m just barely starting to understand it. Sheesh.
And maybe I’m okay with living where I live WHILE not owning the place. Maybe we can normalize that homeownership is not as attainable as it used to be. Besides, we entered this world with nothing and we’re going to leave with nothing but our souls. So why even put myself through all that?
The so called American dream is dead and your life doesn’t have to look like everyone else’s.
Does the depression, sadness and self-pity go away because the season feels lighter and brighter? Maybe we just put it on the backburner until we feel the overwhelming pull of Pluto to take us back under to brood over our sins and aggressions. The neverending balancing act between love / self-forgiveness vs self-loathing, guilt and shame. Such a beautiful mess we humans are.
Everything is a cycle. Cycle of life – death and rebirth.
I really like this drawing of a geometric flower with my bunny in shades. I miss the way I used to draw. I feel like adulthood has robbed me of so much and I feel somewhat resentful. Like, what happened to the old me who used to just draw and create all day for no reason, no purpose whatsoever?
I know a lot of these thoughts are just passing through. I know I have much to be thankful for. It just feels like insanity at times when you realize that you have 12 signs, 12 houses, 10 planets and 4 elements existing within us all – every single one of them wanting to express themselves at any given time in an infinite number of angles.
Enjoy the aging process.
A screenshot from an episode of The Sopranos. It says:
It’s kinda true, isn’t it? As much as I love psychic topics and witchcraft, scammers ABOUND these worlds. Well, ALL worlds actually.
+ They usually DM you first, soliciting their services to you. You’re not interested yet there they are, sliding into your DM’s.
+ They steal other people’s photos and identity. People I’ve followed have had their original photos and content stolen. Hence, the fugly watermarks became a necessity. Unfortunately, people’s words tends to get poached too, making it a lot harder to spot where it came from.
+ As soon as you follow some real IG profiles, they seem to “follow” you out of nowhere.
+ Nothing about their page looks authentic. They’re probably not showing their face either. If they are showing a pic, it’s probably somebody else’s.
+ They might threaten you via DM, saying you are “cursed” if you don’t follow their instructions AND send them a ridiculous amount of money before removing the “curse”. They’re playing on your fear of the unknown. Like, WHAT IF you are cursed? The seed’s been planted into your subconscious and it starts to makes you wonder…
Perhaps the more cunning of these types of people observe their targets from afar first to see who is most likely to fall for their scam. Maybe you’ve been having a streak of bad luck lately; you got into a terrible car accident, or something tragic happened recently that would cause you to put your guard down and believe that you might be “cursed”. You’ve also been a total wreck emotionally and aren’t feeling very grounded.
That’s when opportunity strikes for psychic scammers.
It happens sometimes even if you think you’re smart and careful. You’re gonna feel like a complete dumbass when it happens and that’s ok, lesson learned. Just don’t let it happen again.
Does it go both ways? Yes. I think the universe allows us to be vulnerable to these situations so we can learn from the experience.
This was written on October 29, 2021. Their methods might have changed by then. Either way, always stay aware. They always say ‘be aware of your surroundings’ and that includes people as well. If something is too good to be true, it probably is. Someone offering you something for “free” isn’t necessarily free. If you have any doubts with something, trust your instincts. Research the person reaching out to you. If you can’t find any legit info about them online, it’s probably a scam. Don’t forget to block and report.
This was written 10 years ago as a reply from a user on Reddit and was shared by Reddit on their IG account recently. I had to post it here because feels.
Alright, here goes. I’m old. What that means is that I’ve survived (so far) and a lot of people I’ve known and loved did not. I’ve lost friends, best friends, acquaintances, co-workers, grandparents, mom, relatives, teachers, mentors, students, neighbors, and a host of other folks. I have no children, and I can’t imagine the pain it must be to lose a child. But here’s my two cents.
I wish I could say you get used to people dying. I never did. I don’t want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don’t want it to “not matter”. I don’t want it to be something that just passes. My scars are a testament to the love and the relationship that I had for and with that person. And if the scar is deep, so was the love. So be it. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are a testament that I can love deeply and live deeply and be cut, or even gouged, and that I can heal and continue to live and continue to love. And the scar tissue is stronger than the original flesh ever was. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are only ugly to people who can’t see.
As for grief, you’ll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you’re drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it’s some physical thing. Maybe it’s a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it’s a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.
In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you’ll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what’s going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything…and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.
Somewhere down the line, and it’s different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O’Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you’ll come out.
Take it from an old guy. The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don’t really want them to. But you learn that you’ll survive them. And other waves will come. And you’ll survive them too. If you’re lucky, you’ll have lots of scars from lots of loves. And lots of shipwrecks.
I’m posting this video because I want to save it here. I also want to talk about Chiron for some reason. What do the two have in common? Horses – being that Chiron is a centaur in Greek mythology.
More importantly (at least for me) is that in my birth chart, Chiron is in my third house in Taurus.
If the third house represents communication, it means that I have trouble talking, or speaking or saying things outloud. This is true, as I am an introvert to the core. I’m not very talkative.
Chiron represents the Wounded Healer in astrology, meaning everyone has a Chiron in their chart; everyone has a deep wound that they carry with them in this life that they have to work on healing.
I just discovered this recently which makes a whole lot of sense now, a breakthrough actually:
Copied and pasted from Tea & Rosemary’s blog regarding Chiron in Taurus:
The person with Chiron in Taurus will be afraid of losing something, whether it be safety, money, possessions, abundance, or love. The typical Chiron in Taurus will go to any lengths to avoid losing their home, their routine, the people close to them, their favorite possessions, their money, etc. Even if everything seems very permanent in their life, they will always be scared of some unexpected loss.
This resonates with me So.Damn.Much. Without going into too much detail, even though I have worked for other people most of my life I have always dreamt of being financially independent, like free from a job. I wanted to freelance; didn’t last very long. I wanted to tattoo; that didn’t happen. I wanted to have a small business; I’m barely even making it.
I can’t seem to do the things no matter how much effort I put into it. Not to say this is always true, but I try and fail A LOT it seems.
So yeah, that is my wound. I am afraid to not have resources and so I stay working. I’ve learned to work with this wound by accepting that I am meant to be working where I work. It is not creatively stimulating 24/7 but I am good at it; it has also given me the resources to be the provider and to live a life that is good. I’m also able to give to others freely. That is all I can ask for.
On the upside, I have found that learning astrology has been really good for me. This time though, I’m not trying to be an astrologer or be anything to anyone anymore…like that time I was trying to be a healer. Looking back I feel silly about it now tbh but for one reason or another, IT HAD to be expressed. That was the quality of that time period, where everyone and their mom wanted to be a healer including myself.
To be fair and not be so harsh on myself, my friend did pass away in Oct 2019.
Then 2020 came along and said ‘nope’! Being of service to others is not for me, not this year.
Then 2021 came and my cat had to be put to sleep.
I’m just learning for myself for once. And there is A LOT to learn and my Aquarius ascendant really likes it.
As a matter of fact, I’m learning so much by practice – interpreting people’s chart aspects on Reddit. So many people have questions and post their charts daily…
it’s almost as if getting suspended on Twitter led me to this, a blessing in disguise.
Anyways here is an old, rough drawing of a centaur, which I must’ve drawn when I had green hair. I’ve drawn centaurs a few times because me = Sagittarius.
The death of Roxy and now a year and a half later, Tabby – I feel like – has stunted my creativity and side business pursuits. First I lost interest in Crystal Healer LA, next up is Metaphysical Vibes I think. It’s really not their fault at all but I’m feeling and experiencing the after effects. I don’t have the same energy for things; if anything I’ve been staring off into space a lot. I’ve literally been bringing Hematite and Apache Tear with me to work and it’s been helping me ground and stay in the moment (especially when driving).
I want to disappear from the internet and be anonymous, like the old days. Not to talk shit or anything, just to browse freely without someone trying to steal my personal data for marketing/advertising purposes or identity theft.
Somewhat related to this is a movie with Johnny Depp called Transcendence.
I also like the idea of creating anonymously. In that sense, you don’t have to worry about your identity, especially when it comes to people stealing your work. Not having an identity means you’re less likely to get upset about it. On another note, this is why Bitcoin is so appealing because it is decentralized; the banks don’t own it.
I’ve lost my sense of purpose and I don’t feel motivated – all the signs of grief. Right now I’m thinking to myself ‘why tf am I still here?’
I’m just trying my best to live through it and not be so hard on myself for not creating or being productive. I am grieving after all, I just don’t like to admit it.
I was tired from being on the computer at work so I came home and painted this instead of turning the computer on, which is something I want to do more often. Not saying I was off the computer entirely, I was still on my phone. I was just drawing lines and spirals but subconsciously a dimensional zodiac wheel appeared. I like it so far.
Even though I feel sad and empty, I am aware that other people are experiencing worse than me. There is always something to be grateful for, even in our pain and sorrow.
