Loving yourself has been on the rise as of late and I really think it’s here to stay. Maybe perhaps it’s WHAT I’ve been choosing to see/experience more and more of and so now I see it everywhere; at least in my digital/real world. It’s a beautiful thing to witness people loving themselves, but what does it mean exactly?
I know what you’re probably thinking – the title of the post is completely unrelated to this image I created. Yes, your observations are correct. But I was in the mood, or better yet in a zone to draw crystals with my Wacom tablet while at work for some reason and attach it to this particular post. The title is still related to what I’m about to write…
What would you do if you were fired today? These are the kinds of thoughts that have been occupying my mind lately.
Continue reading “What Would You Do If You Were Fired Today?”
If what you are really passionate about became your job, would you still love it?
Would you still feel the creative fire, or would it be replaced with feelings of obligation? Feeling stagnant and uninspired will also likely soon to follow.
Yes, easy right?
But much harder and more of a challenge to actually stick around and take up space in your own community.
Let’s be real here, do you really want to move; especially if you’ve lived in LA for so long? I’ve thought about the logistics of getting a house that I can actually afford…in the desert, but financially it would still cost the same. And besides, why the hell should you move just because some out-of-towners are taking over your neighborhood. Fight back!
By supporting local businesses, supporting your friends who are all grown up now and have started opening up their own businesses; supporting small mom and pop shops who have become a fixture in the neighborhood. Support them by buying something, don’t ask for free stuff; understand that they have to make money and have bills to pay too.
Fight back by taking up space, why not start your own small business if you have an idea that you think people would love? This is your city, too!
Most of us have gone beyond the self-centered mentality – when you were young all you cared about was yourself. There was a time when it served you well.
Now is the time to give back and help out.
I hope this puts things into perspective a little bit. Here is an excellent read: 9 Tried & True Methods for Fighting Back Against Gentrification
The Death card appeared to me twice this week – first it was Death from the Sacred Symbols Oracle deck with the skull and rose at the beginning of this week on Monday, (top left)…
and then last night when I came home from work. I was sitting at my desk talking to a friend on the phone when I randomly pulled the Death card again from my HK tarot deck (bottom right).
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Edit 10/2/19: some people have asked me where I got the HK tarot deck. I got it from Etsy but I don’t think the person is making them anymore. Sorry! I’m guessing it was a bootleg and the person didn’t want to get sued by HK / Sanrio for using their images.
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I had a few other decks on the table so I decided to pull the other Death cards from them for this photo: top right is from the Albano-Waite deck and bottom left is from Camoin / Jodorowsky’s Tarot de Marseille.
The reason why I have all these tarot and oracle decks is because I am learning from them, they guide me throughout the days of the week. I feel better prepared for real life situations (whether I am consciously aware of them or not), and I admire the artwork too. The Tarot is a teacher. I’ve barely been studying the Tarot for only about 4 years now and I guess this is my method of learning; I learned that the same cards tend to come up in different decks. It probably doesn’t make sense to others, but for me it helps me to see comparisons. Consider it a double or triple confirmation. Some decks I use more frequently than others and so they end up sitting on my desk for months.
Reflecting on all the violent events so far this year made me realize even more that Death is and will always be a constant part of our lives. Someone is probably dying right now at this very moment, but we’re not aware because it’s just another day. So we only pay attention to what we see on TV and social media. We cannot dictate to Death who lives and who dies; Death doesn’t care if you’re gay, a person of color, a cop, a rich or poor person or someone of authority…
Death comes for everyone, this is the ultimate truth. Once you strip away all the complex feelings that humans attach to death – grief, sadness, hate, anger and everything in between…
there is just that, the natural part of life. It seems unnatural that a person dies at the hand of another, but at the same time this is and has been the history of human civilization. A person dies, and another one is born. It’s the cycle that keeps on going, no matter how we feel about it. The World Tarot card appeared to me this week too.
Death is certainly the most painful of all teachers. It is the one that is hard to let go of, to get over with and move on from. It’s especially painful for us who are still alive because we’re the ones who have to keep on living and remembering.
My mom passed away 10 years ago from cancer. I feel as if it was only in these last 4 years when the Tarot showed itself to me, that I started to feel like I could live again.
This is not to say that your feelings and emotions are invalid. They are valid and you have a right to feel the way you do. You can grieve and experience all the feels for as long as you need to, this is what it’s like to be human. Just know that this too shall pass, and that you have people that understand what you’re going through.
Where there is death, there is also rebirth, growth, transformation, healing, a new way of seeing things, a different perspective and so much more. The effects of death are far-reaching; peace, love, unity, justice, karma, and other cause and effects can spring from it. It really puts me in awe.
My cat Tabby started vomiting recently, even though we feed her the same kind of food – a can of wet food (Purina Pro Plan) and some kibble (Nutro). There are a number of reasons why a cat would vomit, but the main reason usually has to do with their diet. Apparently a cat can develop allergic reactions to food as well. We had to figure out which one is the culprit and we think it’s the kibble. I am just posting this link as a reminder.
Today I am dreaming about a few things:
Rather than striving to buy a house (which I can’t afford at my comfort level anyway), I am now dreaming about freelancing yet again.
I’ve been doing the fulltime thing for quite some time now. It’s great to have that security but I also want to experience something different. I tried freelancing a couple of times before but failed.
I want to work for myself, and I want to grow my own business. I mostly just want the freedom to work from home and be at home. I’m kind of a homebody.
But just because it SOUNDS easy doesn’t mean it is.
And this could just be another pipe dream…
or this could be me manifesting a whole new reality.
If it’s in alignment with your highest good, then anything is possible.
Allowing myself to dream on.
Photo is a closeup shot of my favorite Labradorite stone. If you look closely, you’ll see what appears to be a lone figure. He occupies this mystical forest, just being.
I wish I could be like him, to just be. But it is also an inherent part of our human nature to want more for ourselves when our current situation no longer gels – to make our dreams come true, to manifest our truest desires.
This is not really a rant, but more of an observation…
but it seems that those who either grew up in LA or have lived here for a long time can’t afford to buy a house. You either have to move really far away or suck it up; and by suck it up I mean you continue to rent the house or apartment you live in so you could have an easy commute to work and be close to the places you enjoy frequenting. It all boils down to comfort, convenience and sentimental value – you just love that area and don’t see yourself living anywhere else.
But everyone always says it’s better to buy than to rent. My parents were drilling this into my head before I even understood the concept.
Now that I’m a little bit older, I’ve been thinking more and more about buying a house. I’ve talked to others around my age (the 35-45 something crowd) and they want to buy a home too, but none of us can afford it. The prices of homes in certain neighborhoods are going up and a lot of these homes are really just somewhat average.
It’s as if locals are getting pushed out farther and farther out.
I’ve been thinking about how far do I want to live just to have the house I want. But other factors fall in too like will I like the area/neighborhood, how far am I willing to commute to work, etc.
In the meantime, enjoy this beautiful contemporary house I saw during one of my hikes/walks a while back. A bitch can dream, right?
[At the time this was written] I was forced to make a lifestyle change 4 months ago – I went and got a physical and was told that I was prediabetic and had high blood pressure too. Fuckin a, bummer. Being Filipino doesn’t help, either.
If I was still a few years younger, I would’ve probably ignored it and kept on eating the way I did (I did ignore my first warning actually). But this time around, it was different. I paid attention this time and commited myself to reversing this.
So long story short, I’ve been eating better. I’ve also been exercising and exploring LA like I never have before. I am learning to appreciate nature a whole lot more. Admittedly I’ve lived in LA for a long time now, but never explored it’s natural environment.
Here is a list of places I have hiked at so far, this list is just for my own record.
Baldwin Hills Scenic Overlook
Cahuenga Peak
Coldwater Canyon Park
Eaton Canyon
O’Melveny Park
Runyon Canyon
Stough Canyon Nature Center
Temescal Canyon Gateway Park
Wildwood Canyon Park
Stough Canyon Nature Center
Wilacre Park
